Saying the last goodbye to a loved one is never an easy task – and now you have the responsibility of sharing a eulogy with other surviving family and friends. You can spend up to a lifetime knowing a person and whether you lived with the person or saw them occasionally; he or she would have had a major impact on your life. By no means are you expected to detail every aspect of your relationship with the deceased. But if you have difficulty getting started on writing the eulogy, here are a couple of theme ideas you can try.
The Nature of Life and Death
If delving into the details of your relationship and memories with the deceased overwhelms you, take a more objective perspective on death. It may be that the deceased or yourself may have a particular belief on the significance of life and the nature of death that may bring you and the audience closure. Whether that belief is of the soul resting in the heavens or reincarnating into a new lifetime, you have the option of taking a spiritual or philosophical approach in your eulogy.
Thank You for the Memories
When you are in the thick of it, life can distract you from what is really important. And understandably, some people feel they take things for granted – including relationships. This is what makes the passing of a loved one more painful for a surviving family member or friend. But rather than trying to apologise for wrongs in the past with the eulogy, take a more progressive approach. Be grateful for having had the person in your life and cherish the times and memories you have. Having regrets for things that cannot be changed is no way to move forward in your life. So forgive, appreciate and make a determined effort to be a better, and take the opportunity of life that you do have.
You Were Unique and Special
Celebrate the individual that the deceased was. No person is the same, so take the opportunity to get personal. Your eulogy does not have to be all doom and gloom either. Enjoy the freedom of sharing a funny story or a secret quirk that the deceased person had. A little laugh or two can take the edge off the atmosphere and make saying goodbye a lighter on the shoulders.
While a eulogy is presented to the wider audience, do not be afraid to make it a personal expression of love and respect for your deceased loved one. But at the same time, you do not have to force yourself to share memories that are too personal or secret.
If you are still unsure, you can always ask a trusted funeral director for advice – especially ones with experience in the various cultures around Melbourne. But at the end of the day, it is not about writing the greatest eulogy of all time. You will feel the best about it when you writing what is true to heart – and that is the most important thing.